A Furry Little Problem
by IeCunns
Summary: Out and about on another planetary sightseeing, Sylvia fulfils her friendly duties by putting her foot down; Wander's grooming habits are scrutinized and old terrors make an appearance. Now, what could this mean for everyone involved?
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: A huge thank you to my friend deviantartsbiglover to whom I dedicate this story, and will ever be grateful for putting up with me and introducing me to this fandom.

Feel free to drop a line if you wish to criticize, spotted an error or fancy as much. Thank you for taking the time to read it.

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Edit: Punctuation, inserted missing words and added phrases. 13/02/2015

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"Hey, Buddy?" This was going to be difficult.

"Yes, Syl?" Wander's soothing banjo plucking continued unfaltering, with no rhyme or reason to its melody.

"We've been travelling together... for how long now? Almost as long as we've known each other, right? " You're jibber-jabbering, Sylvia. Get to the point!

But how could she introduce such a sensitive topic into a casual conversation _without_ forcing the issue? For all his amazing bouts of wisdom and insight into other people's feelings, some simple things surprisingly managed to escape Wander's notice. And when that happened it fell on her to point them out.

Useless Outlaw Manual had never prepared her for this.

"An' all spent in the best of companies." A smile and slight tip of the hat, and he was back to focusing on his note plucking.

The lovable softy certainly wasn't helping her face her internal hardships.

Of course she wasn't afraid he would be offended. In her whole career as Wander's Best Pal it was so rare an occurrence she could only count on one hand the times she'd witnessed it. And only one of those had been caused by Sylvia. But since forever -somehow- he'd always had this natural aversion to it...

Ahead of them the path became increasingly shadowed by the tall trees surrounding the dirt road. The empty spaces between the vegetation grew sparser as they made their way further into the mountain.

The previous week an orange blur had jumped on her excitedly, waving a flapping colourful pamphlet on her face, all happy chatter in her ear. The exceptional thing, the advertisement on paper said, was a meteor shower would grace the night sky the day of the festival and what a wonderful thing it was to see it whooshing up above them, all sparkly and beautiful, the games the stands the sidewalk shows all sounded so interesting and- Sylvia can we go?

Proposition accepted, the pair started planning to tourist the Summer Festival held by the Mountain People.

Now on the current planet, Sylvia trekked through the forest with her friend saddled on, in search of the village where the end of summer celebration was to be. And with less than a day's walking to reach the populace, it was time to put plan into practice.

With half a mind's attention to the conversation, the smaller traveller remained reclined against her long neck. An absent humming, brother to the now blossoming piece of music, sounded behind Sylvia.

There was only one approach to this. The subtle approach. And if that didn't work, she'd fall back and regroup. Muster all the guts she could and go in for the kill. No reason for this mission to go wrong.

"Wander. You need to take a bath."

Talk about softening the blow.

The female zbornak certainly wasn't known for her gentle demeanour, and caring tenderness when pummelling her enemies. 'Beat baddies first, ask pertinent questions later.' was her unspoken motto. So, despite her existing patience and understanding- all qualities she'd nurtured under Wander's unknown guidance and role-modelling- sometimes, her fiercer nature carried on even in everyday peaceful life.

Hopefully, Wander would take it well. Problem would be solved, crisis averted. End of story.

_Then_ she could stop being apprehensive just for pointing out an issue. Well. That was what friends did. Never in all the revolving stone marbles, did she want to hurt the little fuzz peanut. She loved him too much. Even if, at times, it meant dishing out a little tough love when he acted stupid.

Instantly she felt Wander stiffen his spine in attention. The music halted for a hiccupping moment and then resumed. No humming this time.

"Oh." There was a silent pause between them. Sylvia began breathing again. Pulling back all her good sense to the forefront she rallied for the next bit.

"You know I'm no stranger to stake outs and covert operations. And most of those were executed alongside big sweaty dudes. We kept out of sight and in close quarters, _for days_ in those conditions- it's nothing special." A rush of contained excitement shot through just remembering it. She missed those thrilling if often smelly old days.

"I don't mind it. Why should I? We're constantly hopping off and on planets everywhere in the Open Region. A missed shower or two never killed anybody."

"But. Buddy? Aren't you a little long overdue?"

With a slight turn of the head, she tried peeking back at him. But because of their opposing positions there was no way to glimpse at his face and current mood. Unconsciously she stopped walking.

"I'm saying this because soon we'll be entering 'civilization' again, and from what I could gather around about these people... Well, they have very strong feelings about cleanliness; not to mention we _are_ their guests." How could she say this? "I don't want you feeling uncomfortable about something we can easily fix."

Banjo tucked inside his hat, Wander climbed down from the saddle. It was so pitiful a figure he made that it made her sorry for having to say anything at all. His slumped shoulders and face, shadowed by the wide green brim of his hat, made her chest twinge regretfully. "I know."

Phew. That was good to hear. Even if he only seemed a little morose, an embarrassed undertone wasn't completely hidden away from his voice.

_That_ made her throat a little harder to swallow through.

Unexpectedly Wander righted himself and searched in her eyes, distressed. "I'm sorry Sylvia. That was real bad of me. Making you say something like that. Must'ave been incredibly hard."

"I... I just. Really _really_ don't like it..."

Oh grop. It wasn't like Wander was a hazardous disease-carrying furry slipper of doom. She guessed it was probably a cultural or physiological thing because he didn't seem to really _need_ to bathe that often. Whatever his species was like Sylvia had never encountered another quite like him.

Rifling through her memories she took notice of how much care he took with his fur. Sometimes he'd wake up with a funny case of bed hair but by breakfast it would be neat and tidy as usual. What's more Wander's remaining fur laid flat and his skirt had always flared and perked with no visible tangles unless it was shedding time. And by that time he seemed glad enough to take a bath. No fuss involved.

So that ruled out water phobia. She'd seen him swimming before and that had never been a problem.

Knowing how much delight her buddy took from meeting others, sharing stories, living new experiences, she would do anything in her power so that this next one wouldn't be ruined. Seeing as these fine folk where a little... uptight.

Their last stop before reaching this planet had been a heavily industrialized resting point; its constant exhaust fumes still clung, darkening their colours to rusty copper and murky blue. Although their hosts were known for their hospitality, dropping in a cloud of dust and grime from their travel sure could put a dent in any new relations.

Glancing ahead of them she spotted a wooden bridge and what looked to be a running body of water. Thank grop. Twitching every now and then had stopped relieving her of the ugly sensation caused by the small patches of oil on her back. Horking stingy ship captains and their leaking maintenance-needy pieces of flying junk. Without a second thought Sylvia headed towards it. With her smaller companion trailing behind half-heartedly.

"It's fine. No harm done." She grinned warmly to reassure Wander, not quite containing the anticipation of finally getting all the dirt off of her. "By the way, when was the last time?"

"Les' see..." The counting on his furry fingers kept going up. "Uh... Under a standard year ago?" Not sure about his answer the nomad began his calculations anew.

The creek lay a few meters away when the zbornak turned abruptly. "What!"

Not wanting to spook her friend with any more outbursts she composed herself quickly before continuing rationally. "Well, everyone has different needs, but. Wander that can't be too good for you." By the end of the sentence her concern slipped unchecked into her voice.

Once again, his species _was_ a little mysterious. At least to her it seemed. Besides the little bits and pieces that would come up in conversation with Wander, she didn't pry much. But who was she to say what was or wasn't alright? Take zbornaks, for example, and their not-going-to-the-bathroom for 5 months. Of course it would look strange to an outsider. And her reaction might just be that. Culture shock.

"Wander. Are you. Afraid of water?" Perhaps she'd been too hasty discarding it as a phobia.

"You really think so? But..." Wander scrunches up his face looking inwards for the reasons why. Seeming to find an answer he starts hesitantly."Well, it's just such messy business. You're scrubbed down hard, your skin is all raw and tingly, and I can never get my fur to dry properly for _ages_. Gets all waterlogged an' uncomfortable no matter how many towels I rub on it. I don't mind a lil' dip, tho. But a proper ol' bath? Nah."

And here she thought he might have been traumatized as a child and that was why he was having such a hard time. Because he associated it with negative experiences. "So you just don't bathe more often because you're lazy." She said in her most deadpan voice.

"Maybe?" the cutesy shrug and wacky face only made the situation even more absurd.

Exasperated and not the littlest bit amused she hardened her self and applied her no-nonsense voice."Wander. You will take a bath."

"NO."

And then he continued in a considerably smaller voice. "It took me an awful long time to get my fur the way I like it."

If big babies couldn't be reasoned with what else could she do? Fast like lightning Sylvia picked him up with the intent of dipping him into the creek. However, Wander's constitution took the better of her; slipping down her hands ironically, like a wet bar of soap.

"Syl Syl! Please it's awful!" A bystander dropping on them would sooner think he was closer to begging for his life than dodging out of a bath.

Turning left, jumping right, ducking under her legs, the nomad only missed doing combo moves in his effort to get away, so similar where his movements to one of Lord Hater's video games.

By now the relentless zbornak was working up a sweat, bypassing any previous directives of being gentle and simply wishing to drop him unceremoniously into the water. The following sense of accomplishment and satisfied smirk would be all worth it.

Wander was being impossible! He scuttled every which way just to avoid her grabbing swipes. Even getting low on all fours. The image rendered him a surprisingly fiercer look, fur skirt jutting up like a scorpion's tail.

Soon both were tired enough their movements slowed and chests heaved. The little menace went to grab Sylvia's tail and held on for dear life.

Frowning a little in disbelief because she only had to flex her tail to the front to reach him, she halted. Okay. This had escalated rapidly.

They stared each other down for what couldn't have amounted to more than a handful of seconds. No next moves shined through. Preparing to reel him in, her tail had just started to curve when she heard hissing. Wander was hissing at her feeling cornered and frightened as a cat about to be tossed off the edge of a cliff.

"Oh flarf hangling frump scratcher! That's it. I Give Up." Taking only the time to pinch her nose Sylvia promptly jumped into the creek.

A few bubbles made it to the top of the water before both broke the surface. Despite the loud gasping that resulted, it took a long time before either got their breathing back to normal. Snorting lightly to clear the last of the water, Sylvia peeked through her limp magenta comb in search of her friend.

What a sight the two of them made. She, a big blob of blue with its wick wet and floppy; and he, a skinny orange clump of unmanageable fur all runny from the excess water.

Snickers rose muffled into full blown laughter. There was nothing else funnier than their current appearance, which was more than enough to dispel the horrible tension from before. And nothing else mattered. In fact Wander was laughing so hard he'd fallen back into the water, big bubbles pushing upwards as he sank quickly.

Without a second thought, Sylvia scooped him up and steered them both into dry land. The trip took longer than expected because none had ceased in their mirth. So they padded through the water, zigzagging, drunkenly happy and relieved.

On firm ground, their giggles slowly died down into quiet companionship.

After sunbathing on the grass for a few hours, the twin suns belonging to the local planetary system had reached high enough their reddish yellow glare peeked through the green canopy.

And now that they were both clean enough and back to their respective colourations they would continue on their journey. No shocked whispers or indignant glances would follow them as they crossed the gates opening to the Mountain People's village. And the same could be said for any hard feelings trailing behind after their brief scuffle. Because they trusted each other enough that a bop in the head would be understood when they acted silly.

The peaceful atmosphere stretched on while they rested, enjoying the view provided by the calming drifting blue clouds and the ancient patterned swirls in the bark of trees.

"I was reading on the Mountain People last night, 'cus me sleep shutters came in late, an' did you know they worship this god who helped them reach...-" Once Wander's excitement exploded there was no putting a lid on it.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: Before I started this I only knew where I wanted this to go. Right now I'm not too sure how it ended up here.

**Warning**: Dubious sightings of one-sided skeleton dance (Wander/Hater). This isn't what this story is about. So. Rest assured I strived to make it light-hearted and strip it of romantic undertones for those off put by it. All very much under canon constrictions.

I wasn't sure if I should continue this, and that's why I tied it up nicely in that single chapter, but from the little feedback I got none of it was negative. Also I was a little sad that I hadn't got to the real plot that made me write it yet... So here's another chapter!

Once again, feel free to drop a line if you wish to criticize, spotted an error or fancy as much. Thank you for taking the time to read it.

Psst. It's much bigger.

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The audience was rendered quiet but not entirely speechless. A small play, a puppet show of sorts, was re-enacting a well known legend from the people's folklore. And it was amazing. Whenever the events came to a complicated climax or the heroes faced great uncertainty and peril, several of the spectators gasped and awed, completely focused on the story. And Wander was just another one among them.

Getting swept up by the flowing tale, he heard of the adventure of the Mountain People against an ancient foe. He wasn't too sure what had happened before he had arrived, but since he'd found a seat, among the children facing the open curtains of the stage, he had not looked away.

The backlit paper characters glided and moved, going about fulfilling their roles. Their ornate decorations and colourful attire in addition to making the show grow a life of its own, marked their personality and peculiar traits. There were no visible strings to speak of. The puppets seemed to be commanded from below and through a supporting wooden rod. Their movements were a little restricted but the voices aptly covered for all shortcomings and gave them a great expressive liberty.

The hero it seemed was enamoured with one the villagers, a blueberry bush. His name was...Wisp. Wit? (He was a little unsure since the story wasn't in Standard but one of the galaxy's peculiar dialects. One of the many out there in the universe he had yet to learn.) And, was something of a foreigner to the native lands. And a coward.

Fond of hiking and knowledgeable on all kinds of flora, once, he went on an excursion to the mountains with a group of villagers. A few hours into their trip they came across a wicked creature and so terrified was this Wisp he left in a flurry of panic, leaving everyone else behind.

At this moment Wander turned slightly to his left and whispered conspiratorially to his side, "Oh oh, Sylvia! This is getting _exciting_." Only to find a stubby looking kid looking at him confused. Oops. It seemed he had left Sylvia's side. Again.

He mouthed a theatrically huge and stretched out 'So-ooo-rry.' and peeked over the top of everyone's head. No big blue besties in sight. Hm. The show would be ending soon. Was it too bad if he waited for the rest of the story before he got back to her?

Just then, a huge collective gasp saved him from the dilemma by grasping his attention back to the performing dolls.

The hero was dropping from above, his big blue umbrella steadying his fall onto the back of the sleeping creature. Oh boy was it scary and big! Wander clutched the hat on his lap protectively; apprehensive with the development. Wasn't the long legged fellah scared?

Apparently, Wisp had felt so guilty for not helping the others in their hour of need, that he'd accompanied the other hero in the story -the blueberry bush, friend and love interest- in a quest to vanquish the Beast. And in his effort to redeem himself and present a better self to his crush, devised a clever plan.

Despite his soft landing the creature was rattled from its sleep. But it, however much to its chagrin, didn't attack the intruder. Because it so happened that during the day, on the hours when the suns glowed the strongest, it was sluggish and incapable of moving no more than its eyes and mouth.

So the traveller talked to the Beast, leaned over the huge head so his voice could be heard; and finding that it was lonely and rational, charmed and nurtured a bond with him. Meanwhile, the light in the sky steadily diminished.

They talked for great lengths of time. On top of the great creature's back he stretched out on the gnarly vines that made him up, and laid on the tufts of greenery that sprouted all over his shoulders. All this new and strange movement disturbed the tiny ecosystem making several pods release a cloud of golden dust.

He sneezed fiercely from the aggravating pollen. And as a result, he felt a great flinch beneath him. Wisp took out a handkerchief, and sniffling meaningfully to the Beast that he was over, frowned thoughtfully. The back of the creature was entirely covered by water shy plants. Huh.

Reaching again towards the big perked ear of the creature, he touched his soggy handkerchief to the very top of it. And watched incredulously when it shrunk and fizzled painfully to the agonized whines of the Beast.

The tale went on and on until its conclusion, which as always, is happy for some and not so much for others.

Story tale finished, the curtains were drawn shut only to open again to the appearance of the performers behind stage; followed by a much heartfelt clapping from the audience. Soon with the show over, parents picked up some of the children while others sauntered off to new amusements.

Happy and heart full from the experience, Wander got up. After stretching for a measure he felt a sting. Scratching his rump the nomad looked back at the pillows placed on the floor. He frowned. They had seemed comfortable enough earlier.

"Wander!" Far away in the middle of the bustling crowd Sylvia made her way towards her friend. He spotted her, mostly because of her towering height over most of the villagers, her comb swaying gracefully to the rhythm of her bypassing others in a chaotic directional pattern. On the side of her head was an obnoxiously colourful wooden mask he'd seen some of the peddlers earlier waving around and enticing kids to buy.

Wander felt like he could always count on Sylvia's inner GPS to know how to find him. Therefore glad to be reunited with the zbornak, he took flight just as an opening cleared in the crowd. Barrelling into Sylvia and wrapping his arms around her.

"Oof! ...So, had fun all by yourself?" She teased after replacing the air on her lungs.

"Ah. I did wander off again, didn't I?" Sheepishly remembering what had made him steer away. "Sorry..."

"Enough with your bad puns." His head was still uncovered so she took the opportunity to ruffle his hair affectionately."Wanna hit the food stalls? I could go for some grub right about now."

In a land where the cooking skill and ingenuity it was done with had reached a level of effortless art, Sylvia was certainly looking forward to all the foreign local cuisine. Never let it be said she didn't know how to enjoy the best things in life.

"Sure thing!" And with a practiced twist of his wrist the smaller alien placed the big green hat on his head, ready to go. Since the path between novelties and stalls of goods was narrow and full of locals and festival visitors alike, Sylvia grabbed her buddy and placed him on her shoulders in a piggyback ride. This way they could talk more comfortably in the midst of folk music and loud chatter, of all the things they had seen when apart.

Most of the people attending the celebration were locals and that was made quite obvious by their appearance. The Mountain People were a curious bunch of, well basically, walking trees and shrubbery. Everyone looked trim and proper, even the hardier and bushier of them. And Wander was delighted to study every little bit of their lives.

Their dinner had been scrumptious and Sylvia had made mental notes of the dishes she would like to try the next time they would be eating out. So, with bellies full and content they strolled around the sights waiting around until the time came for the next event on the list. She occupied herself with the remnants of her drink while Wander kept busy chatting up a storm.

Everything was worth mentioning. How the villagers adorned themselves with silken sashes with repeating patterns or summer themes; how mesmerizing the dance troupe they had bypassed earlier was, big billowing sleeves trailing after them; even the sticky blob candy they had both tasted was curious and unlike anything the nomads had seen before. And Sylvia had to admit. She was glad her buddy had convinced her to take a detour here.

Lulled into conversation she gazed around. The village's architecture was entirely built on strong wooden beams interlacing each other to form graceful flat walled houses. Topping the dainty simple homes of the inhabitants was the peculiar type of ceramics, styling the roof tiles in a myriad of colourful veins and dots. Their tones and shadows were even more pronounced by the rows of lanterns on most streets.

Which coupled with the gently pulsing lights and triangular paper streamers arching from pole to pole created a wonderful cosy atmosphere.

"The gist of it was: you place your hip like so..." He exemplified. "Tilt your head and lower your eyes. Like this."

"Wander. That looks more like a pin-up pose than anything else."

"But it's really effective! Since the high shaman discovered it, attacks from invading tribes went down by roughly 40%." Anything that fostered peace between rival cultures was good enough for him. Good neighbouring relations were important after all.

"Hah. You try making goo-goo eyes at Hater next time and see if it works." She said with a snort.

"Hehe. Maybe... But. I know. He's not what you'd call a 'nice guy'", he air quoted in a gruff voice, "but he's a friend! At least for me... No need to spook'im out."

By this time their stroll had brought them to the calm waters of a river. The quiet sloshing of the dark stream reflected the many stars out. Already several people were breaking away from the festivities in preparation for the approaching swarm of meteors. Here, it looked like the perfect spot for some cosmic entertainment.

Over in the shallow water Sylvia could hear different croaks and the teetering of critters roaming about. And the unrehearsed concert of sounds relaxed her somewhat, the strains in her muscles easing out like rain off a slick doom dragon's back.

Seemingly reading her mind Wander took off to the grassy sloped banks. "What about parkin' here?" He reached inside his hat and grabbing a chequered fuzzy blanket laid it neatly on the ground.

They settled on it. Sylvia taking up most of the space, stretching her bones with the a few gratifying pops, while Wander circled for the optimal spot. Finding it near a corner of the fabric he finally took a seat, his usual energetic demeanour calm and peaceful.

It was odd. Since arriving and breaching through the thick gaseous atmosphere around a day and a half ago, everything had been illuminated almost constantly. This was nothing new to Wander, and he found his body was already setting itself to the flow of things. He had just that much faster and adaptable a circadian rhythm.

Travelling around by means of orble juice for long periods of time made it a necessity to know how to get by on little to almost no lighting on those trips. So the shocking contrast between dark space and glaring brightness had made them both try and blink away the difference. Flashes from the glaring light had remained under their eyelids for a few moments after landing. And all through their stay, the luminosity had only varied slightly in intensity and hue according to the celestial movement.

On a planetary system with two suns, nights where hard to come by. Not exactly non-existent but it did make the days in this planet considerably longer in duration than on other single-star lit planets. All life here had long adapted to the fast turning rotational spin of the home planet and didn't think twice about the rising and setting of the suns constantly racing after each other.

And as cosmic causality would have it, the very moment the meteor shower came to pass, both glowing orbs would be hidden away and everywhere would be fully dark. This fact granted the event all the more uniqueness and special appreciation.

The orange nomad gazed up at the stars. His mind flitting back to the earlier conversation with Sylvia.

He couldn't remember ever meeting a living skeleton before Lord Hater. Or any other after, for that matter. And as the towering white fellah made up entirely up of bones-he'd checked-rambled on and on about his growing empire and future galactic domination, Wander had been so profoundly excited he'd jumped right into a multitude of questions, _and_ the hugging part. No introductions.

Um. That had been mighty rude of him.

It was something Sylvia kept reminding him. About personal space bubbles and how most people they encountered didn't take kindly to that sort of stuff being invaded. So. They had started on the wrong foot. No problem! Wander thought he had only to make it up to him. By being extra friendly.

Hater was completely passionate about his goals in life. It was clear he had thought about them long and hard. That kind of dedication and determination to see your dreams come true was inspiring. And that made him sparkle in his eyes, even if most of those wishes tended to ruin other people's lives.

But he'd been able to inspire an entire watchdog army to his ideals. Those soldiers were loyal and steadfast to their lord. No one completely terrible could ever hope to do that. Those little guys looked up to him and became sad whenever he felt down. They counted on each other to do their jobs, and Wander knew every single one of them would be happy to help Lord Hater. Particularly, Mr. Peepers. Those two had a close bond fuelled by common interests. Thick as thieves, was the expression. Which, they actually _were_, being partners in crime and all.

Hater had so many good points. He was punctual, dressed stylishly, had a _lovely_ deep voice, big green eyes... Who wouldn't want to be friends with him? He had even helped Wander more than once. Steering him from sudden death, and who could forget, adopting adorable cuddly Captain Tim!

Not to mention his neat flashing powers. He would go ZAP ZAP, and green electricity shot out of his hands. Not many species or rather, people were gifted with magic. It was a wonderful and amazing gift to have. And that only made him more special.

Special, like tonight's rare meteor shower. He wished more people could be witness to some of the amazingly beautiful things he experienced on his journeys with Sylvia. Hater included. Wander was certain even today's cosmic display would have impressed the more often than not grumpy Lord.

He worried a lose piece of red thread, winding and unwinding it around his littlest finger in an absent occupation for his mind.

"Do you think I'm too... optimistic?" Sometimes his good nature took the best of him and he knew he would feel disappointed later if his skewed hopeful view of reality was proven wrong. He abandoned the piece of thread altogether to rest his hands on the blanket, pulling its corner to wrap all around him like a cocoon.

"More often than not, Hater acts all tough making these speeches about defeatin' us and gettin' all cranky and riled up when we interrupt some of his plans. I mean, most of'em ain't _really_ on purpose, we just mess with the honestly hurtful ones... "

He relaxed his grip on the cloth making his head and shoulders peek through, concentrated on speaking his doubts. "But. Once he forgets to be bad and let's himself have a lil fun, then- Then he happily goes along with some of my games."

Wander just _had_ to pick the evilest, angst-prone, and most emotionally stunted kid from the bunch to befriend. Sylvia didn't feel too comfortable with the fact. But she let him finish his train of thought before saying anything.

"It's not much, nothing really. Still, it gets me all happy and confident to know that he enjoyed himself. Like on his birthday party!"Here all his previous uncertainty fled and he now sported one of his hooded looks accompanied with a sly grin.

"Not to mention all the attention. Chasing after us, an' all." He said voice hushed. "I gotta say it's kinda flattering, ya know?"

How could she respond to _that_? Sometimes she swore Wander had a little bit of a sadist in him by the way he enjoyed teasing.

"I'm sure you have this crazy fantasy that your goodwill and kindness might just melt his cold stiff heart. But, tough luck buddy that might be pushing it since I doubt his skinny white butt has any heart to speak of." She was quite unsure how to go about this, but someone had to play the voice of reason and remind Wander he just might be playing with fire.

"I admit. It was fun seeing that guy contort himself like an overturned beetle at his birthday party. But despite always getting side tracked by your antics he's quite capable. As bad guys go I guess he's earned his title of 'Lord'. And he's capable of much more."

"...I understand~", he truly did. And that made him a little sad to know he still hadn't been able to overcome that piece of the Hater puzzle," And I don't wanna say you're _completely_ right, because that's an awful bleak prospect to nod off to... But, all the more reason! To keep at it. To spring upon 'em with joy and candour, giv'em a lil taste of what it can be like on the other side of the fence." Eagerness and determination renewed on his mission, the furry fellow paused wistfully.

"The opportunities to bring happiness to others are as many as the stars, and I never get tired of it. That good gutty feelin' you get, from puttin' a smile on someone's face, never grows ol' or dimmers in size."

"It's so filling, so powerful a thing I sometimes wonder, 'I could fuel myself only on that and never feel hunger'." A musical lilt came into his voice making his statement vibrate and shift with a pure contained energy.

It was times like these that remembered Sylvia of all the things that had first drawn her to him. And how after so many years wandering; alone or with the occasional companion, all over space, no matter how dark or bright the place; he still remained remarkably unchanged in essence."That's really beautiful, Wander."

"...Which isn't entirely true." He chuckled sheepishly. "I might get by on lil', but my tummy can rumble something fierce when the motor's runnin' on empty."

"Oh, I remember quite well. That time when we were stranded during a desert storm, caught unawares and without supplies. With nothing else to eat _but_ beef jerky. We waited for almost a week in the constant company of that old washing machine's background noise." She pointed to his stomach sardonically."Until someone finally broke their stubborn self-imposed fasting."

"Bleh." Sticking out his tongue did little to get out the aftertaste left by those memories.

"You know how I feel about that... but those spiders sure were tasty." That had been a nice surprise twist to the whole ordeal in Wander's opinion.

Now it was Sylvia's turn to look a little greener than usual. All eight of its legs and furry red whiskers, scurrying all over the ceiling of the cave they had took shelter in. Well, it did save their lives after all. She was at least grateful for that. For that, and the knowledge that she wouldn't taste that particular _delicacy_ any time soon.

"Weeeell. Just have to crack that hard shell and look for the soft bits!" It was cute sometimes, Wander thought as he brushed gently on some of the perkiest blades of grass between his feet, how shy and awkward the big skeleton got.

Now Sylvia was feeling a little off about this. Wander couldn't be this naïvely optimistic. Right?

"I know. If it depended on you everyone would get along, making friends with everybody else, hugsie and feelsie, sharing cups of sugar and all that sweet rot but- Some people are more- and I mean _way_ more- prickly than others. And knowing your relentless luck and perseverance maybe it's a matter of time until you win them over." It was a fact. Her buddy had a talent for always coming out on top, no matter the odds. Like the universe's scales were almost permanently tipped in his favour. And convincing him it was better to cultivate some of his lacking preservation instinct was probably not going to do him any good. Or be in any way effective.

With no likely foreseeable answers on the horizon she went with the flow. No harm done, right. They were just talking.

"Look at me for instances, never in a wild dream would I have thought I would end up here. Tagging along, helping folk out. With Mr. Kindness himself." Here Sylvia nudged him on the shoulder. As a result, the nomad wobbled precariously before sitting up properly once again, rosy cheeked.

"So looking at your track record, who knows? Maybe all the 'scary big skeleton' needs is a true friend." She said, describing the overlord in a silly voice. Giving up a chance to mock the 'greatest ruler in the galaxy'? Pshhh. Yeah. And her name wasn't Sylvia. "Grop knows there's already too much hate out there."

Taking the opportunity to push his buttons a little more she pointed out.

"Like my pal right here." She grinned fondly towards him. Admittedly, by now, an unreformed Sylvia would most likely be taking up residence in one of those lovely 3-by-4 single flats at the Cosmic Criminal Holding.

"Syl~ " he whined self-conscious; covering his hot cheeks, "Stop, ya making me blush." Relenting she simply laughed.

While Wander recovered himself from what he'd called a flood of undeserved praise, she stretched more comfortably on the blanket. Maybe they didn't need to worry about lodging somewhere. It was such a warm and peaceful night, perfect for camping out under the stars.

Conspicuous colour rubbed away from his face, he gladly joined watching the slow pacing night sky. The bright constellations where visible and outlined mythical figures probably only native to the surrounding planetary systems. "Oh oh! I spot a great bi-horned Zbornak. Aren't those really rare?"

"Yeah. And the sourest losers in the galaxy..." Why not. They had the time. And crossing arms behind her neck scanned quickly hoping something would pop up at her. It did.

"Yeesh. That one looks like that nightmarish spider I thought had got to you. Ugh. Bad memories." Holy Grop, that left a bad taste in her mouth. Wasn't this children's game supposed to be harmless?

It still frightened her sometimes. Thinking that one day, she might not be close enough to help her friend when he got himself in trouble. But she always squashed it mercilessly telling those worries to go die alone and away from her.

She was strong, she was fast, and sometimes she had to trust Wander's judgement on things too. His knack for always falling upright no matter the tumble always amazed her. Even if it did a number on her nerves.

Beside her she heard him sighing thoughtfully.

"I wonder how the lil guy's doing."

"Oh he must be striving, alright. All the snacks and prey he could ever wish for, on hand." Who could have guessed the two evil monsters would have bonded so well. Evil pet and evil pet owner alike. It was a match made in heaven.

Too bad for the watchdogs she had heard. It looked like Captain Tim took his rightful place on the ship to be as another one of their natural predators.

And they were back to Hater territory. He seemed to have become a regular fixture in their conversations.

Like gaping holes through a thick dark fabric bright orbs started appearing on the star lit sky. An overjoyed murmur floated up from the flocking groups of sky watchers making the nomads perk up their ears. Illumination came on from above, lighting up the numerous spectators eyes.

It was simply amazing. In the cover of darkness and fearing his smile might split his face in half, Wander wiggled away from the cool grass, closer to Sylvia. And after interlacing their hands together in excitement he resumed watch over the natural ceiling, sharing this moment with his best friend.

On her side, Sylvia heard her buddy squeal quietly in happiness. Her hand was joined with his against the middle of his chest and she could feel the quick beating of his heart. Also a little overwhelmed, by both the tingly warmth in her reach as well as the explosion of light on her face, she shared her thoughts. "Pretty great, huh?"

Still overcome by the beauty of the sparkling racing sky he nodded enthusiastically. "Uh-huh!"

The colourful tailed meteors were so near some asteroids rained down visibly in a curtain of golden sparkle. They glided softly, compared to their rushing parents and towards the ground before disappearing without a trace.


End file.
